WTF is Russia up to?

Seriously what is Russia up to? First, they arbitrarily decide that the North Pole is theirs. The North Pole is part of Canada. Everyone knows that Santa is Canadian, his address is: SANTA CLAUS NORTH POLE HoH oHo CANADA Russia did at one time own a piece of North America, but they sold it to the USA. I don't think the USA is interested in returning Alaska. Russia decided to plant one of their flags on the bottom of the sea, in the hopes of laying claim to our territory. Silly Russians, we own that land the same way we own you in hockey. Now the Russians are showing off there new super powerful non-nuclear bomb. Apparently this bomb is able to wipe out large areas without leaving the toxic fallout of a nuclear bomb. This bomb seems to be geared towards clearing out an area, say the North Pole, and making it inhabitable by the Russians soon after an attack. What are the Russians thinking? Do they seriously think they are just going to bomb the crap out of the arctic and take it from us for the oil up there? Listen up Russia, us Canadians are very nice people. We will happily sell you some of our oil at a very reasonable price when we feel that we can extract it with minimal environmental damage. Until then, back off. In the winter time, there is still enough ice for us to walk over there and kick your ass if you want to keep taunting us.